Probably the hardest thing about being a parent.
We all know we shouldn’t give in or go back on our word, but when you get those little eyes looking up at you it is so hard not to.
I didn’t give in tonight and so had a 3 hour meltdown.
That is how long it took my girl to process what I had told her.
Was I tempted to give in?
Was I tempted to change my mind?
Every. Single. Second.
My girl lives in a world of suprises.
A chaotic world where things change in the blink of an eye.
It is confusing.
She does not feel safe.
As carers, we try our hardest to make her feel safe.
We have to provide consistancy.
Like all children, my girl needs boundries.
In order to make her feel safe we need to be consistent.
What we struggle with is consistency when dealing with behaviour.
It is so difficult to determine the Autism from the naughtiness.
The behaviours from the pushing the boundaries.
She still needs to be told off. She needs boundaries in order to make her feel comfortable.
We need to remember that what we do one day, should be the same the next.
If we give in and the child receives their goal, then the behaviour is reinforced.
We need not to give in as we are too tired to fight, or we feel like letting them off this once.
Consistency is key.
It is hard to maintain.
So difficult when you are exhausted, when you are out, when you have siblings.
But eventually by being consistent the child will learn what to expect and when to expect it.
Consistency plays an enormous role,
Consistency doesn’t leave room for confusion.
Consistency is the hardest thing to manage.