Fear…

​Sometimes I forget how scary a meltdown is.

How scary it looks.
How frightening it is….for her….and for onlookers.
To us it is normality.
The screaming, the shouting, the violence, the loss of control.
It is normal.
Part of our everyday life.

I am not scared of it.
I know what to expect, I know it will calm eventually.
I know it is part of my girl.
Onlookers don’t.

Today we had some family visit.
My girl was overwhelmed and lost control.
Shouting, screaming, biting….
…and they were scared.
They had fear in their eyes.
It hit me like a punch in the stomach.
They were scared.

Normality for us isn’t normality for everyone else.
I forget that.

I had forgotten what it is like not to be waiting for a meltdown.

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