T’was the night before Christmas and all through the house,
Every creature was stirring, even the mouse.
The stockings weren’t hung on the fireplace with care,
They were pulled off in a rage and thrown onto the chair,
My boy was all snuggled up in his bed,
Whilst my girl was drawing Christmas pictures on her head,
Mummy going crazy, Daddy in a flap,
Both wanting to settle our heads for a long winters nap.
When out on the landing there arose such a clatter,
I sprang out of the room to see my girl on the ladders,
Away to my girl, I flew like a flash,
To see my girl trying to open the loft hatch,
When, what to my wandering eyes did appear,
But the santa stop here sign being thrown at my ear.
With my girl being so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment, I must ring St Nick.
I shouted my husband, up my phone came,
I speed dialled his number and shouted his name,
“Santa its me, don’t come here with Vixen,
With Rudolph, or Comet or Donner or Blitzen,
Don’t land my roof, or climb up my walls,
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!”
My girl looked in horror and let out a sigh,
She looked out of the window, up into the sky,
Then just in that moment, out of the blue,
She asked if I was joking, if what I was saying was true,
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof,
A seagull; no a reindeer, and all of their hooves,
As I looked up the ladder, my girl began to get down,
So I said “I heard Santa, don’t make a sound,”
She jumped off the ladder, straight onto my foot,
I yelled, “ssshh I hear santa, I can smell soot,”
She asked if her presents were still in his sack,
I said look at your bed, you’d better go back.
You’ve had Melatonin, Mum should be getting merry,
She should be sipping on wine, cheeks all rosy like cherries.
My girls’ sweet little mouth, her nose all aglow,
From the rage of the moment, its all starting to go,
The square of her jaws, the clench of her teeth,
It started to relax, we started to breath.
She thought of santa and his little round belly,
That shook when he laughed like a bowl full of jelly,
She jumped back in bed, back to her old self,
We laughed when we saw her, her cheeky face like an elf,
A wink of Dads’ eye and a twist of his head,
We knew my girl was getting settled in bed,
Santa was smiling, he got back to work,
He came down the chimney, jumped out with a jerk,
He filled up the stockings on his tippety toes,
Then giving a nod ,up the chimney he rose.
My girl sprang out of bed after an hour of sleep,
She can’t sleep too long, she has a tradition to keep,
But I heard, as she looked out the window into the night,
She said, “I love you Father Christmas, have a good night.”