As I watched my child today I wondered if people can tell that she has Autism.
I wondered if anyone can tell she is different.
Do other people see what I see?
Have I made the right decisions for her?
To tell people your child is on the Autistic Spectrum or not?
Should I have?
Something I had never thought about.
Something a friend has chosen not to do.
Something I have always done without thinking about it.
Was I right? Am I right?
Has my child now been ‘labelled’.
Is my child now treated differently?
Is my child now judged on her condition not her ability?
Do people expect less of her because of it. Something I shared as I thought it may help….
But has it?
Did I have too high expectations?
Something I did as a cry for help when things got tough?
Something I then realised there’s not alot of help for.
Should I have let her grow up without a ‘label’ and let people see the differences themselves?
Should I have got the label to get her the support she needs?
Should I tell people my child has Autism?
….something I now don’t know.
I want people to be Autism aware, but I don’t want to draw attention to my child.
I want to talk about Autism, I live and breath Autism, but am I doing the right thing?
Sat in a café watching a 10 year old ripping up teabags, and mixing it in milk with tomatoes, sugar, salt, pepper…..anything she could lay her hands on.
Seeing the enjoyment as she squashed it all between her fingers.
Feeling the guilt as I watched the mess she was making.
Apologising and telling the waitress my girl has Autism…..
…..apologising for Autism, or a 10 year old girl exploring new textures?
Should I have told the waitress?
Should I tell people?
Should I feel like I have to use her diagnosis to excuse her behaviours?