Expectations.

“Better than you expected?”
A question that I got asked today.
A question I quickly answered before I realised what it meant.

This week at school is very different for my girl.
For the last 3 days of the week the school have all moved into their, what will be, new classrooms in September.
Huge, huge, change for my girl.

Today was her second day in the new class.
(It will be her final year in this school before she moves to secondary, yikes!)
After collecting her one of her old teachers caught me and asked how it went.
I told him how it went well, and he asked “better than you expected?”
….I said yes.
But what had I expected?

I had thought my girl would find it difficult…
…but not expected her to.
I had thought that the change may cause meltdowns…
…but had not expected it to.
I had thought she may not like her new teacher…
…but I had not expected her to.
I had thought she may enjoy being the oldest in the school…
….but not expected her to.

Do you see the difference?
The truth is I didn’t expect anything, but I felt compelled to answer yes.

We all expect a great deal from our children.
It is human nature.
Because we love our children, we want the best for them.
But sometimes our expectations are too high.

Growing up is bound by rules of when milestones should met and by comparison to other children.
What we forget is that every child is unique and has differing abilities.
So we sometimes expect our children to do things they are not able to do simply because ‘they should be’ at that age.
Each and every child is unique and develops differently. We should celebrate their uniqueness instead of expecting them to conform to ‘normal’.

So, it is fair to say I wasn’t expecting anything this week.
I don’t ever expect anything.
I think and come to logical conclusions as to what the outcome maybe, but never expect it.

Having a child with Autism means the only thing you can expect is the unexpected!
The predictable, unpredictable nature of Autism means that no 2 days are ever the same.

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