Best friends.

Today is my best friends birthday.
Happy Birthday!

She is my only truely close friend.
I know, and like, many people, and say hello to them as we pass, but, if I am honest, I find friendships difficult.

I am, I suppose, an unreliable friend.
I am one of those who lets you down last minute, one of those who always promises to come for a coffee, but never gets around to it.
It is not that I dislike company, I very much crave it infact.
I just know that I will offload all my Autism related offerings, and many find that hard.
I find it hard.

I need a friend who gets it.
Someone who is not horrified by the goings on in our Autism house.
Someone who is not easily offended.
Someone who is understanding and kind.
……someone who ‘gets it’.

It took a long time, and alot of heartbreak, to find someone I could rely on.
It took me a long time to let someone into my life and trust them with our autism.

My best friend is someone I can talk to about anything without being judged.
My best friend is someone who will listen to me when I am too scared to talk to anyone else.
My best friend is someone who doesn’t get offended when I cancel our plans for the 4th time running.
My best friend looks at my injuries in sympathy, not in horror.
My best friend meets me for tea and cake knowing I will sit and moan the whole time.
My best friend will look after my child whenever I need her to without a second thought.

My best friend doesn’t avoid me when my child is having a meltdown.
My best friend brings her children over to play with no fear.
My best friend doesn’t brag about how much more her child can do than mine.

In the early, dark days, of diagnosis I thought I would always be alone.
I didn’t think anyone would be my friend because I no longer feel like an individual.
I am an Autism Mum. My life is all things Autism…..
…..but I still needed a friend.
I have met many great people as I have travelled this path, many special people.
All have offered help, support and a shoulder to cry on.
One in particular has stuck by me through thick and thin……one who feels like family.
Happy Birthday to that very special person. ❤
…..and thank you.

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