Dear the future.

Dear the future. I see you there, lurking. I hear you calling out. I see your shadows following me with every tick of the second hand. I know you are going to get me. I know the future will come. But, future, I am scared. I am terrified of what you will bring to my…… Continue reading Dear the future.

Broken.

A broken cup……or me? Sitting still, Chaos around me, I’ve gone cold, Inside’s empty, The shouts get louder, I know how it goes, The afterschool meltdown, The whole street knows. Standing still, In view; exposed, I am drained, The door is closed, Meltdown continues, I want to flee, I’m stuck here watching, Please don’t touch…… Continue reading Broken.

Autism, being different is a good thing.

Today was superhero day at school. The children had worked hard to design their own superhero, and today they were able to dress up and become them for a day. This worried my girl greatly. (She hates superheros and tends to favour the more naughty characters!) She had said she wasn’t going to go in…… Continue reading Autism, being different is a good thing.

Our Autism groundhog day.

Do you ever feel like you are being left behind? Friends move on, family members have their own families, people get jobs, have babies….. Me? I just stay me. Unemployed. With very few friends. Isolated and lonely. Standing still in a world that is moving too quickly around me. I am a carer. A stay…… Continue reading Our Autism groundhog day.

“Orange Autism.”

We all develop little tricks to help with our childrens anxiety. We all gave our own little coping stratedgies to try. We tried one with my girl for when we went out in the car. It worked really well……..until it turned into an obsession. Autism one, parenting fail. When I was younger we used to…… Continue reading “Orange Autism.”

Complaint, Our Autism Mum.

What do you do when you need to complain about something……but you feel bad doing it? Bad because you like the place. Bad because you like the people. Bad because you don’t want then to dislike you. Bad because you feel guilty. Crazy isn’t it? I feel guilty submitting a complaint! I have good reason,…… Continue reading Complaint, Our Autism Mum.

Anxiety and Autism.

Anxiety and Autism seem to go hand in hand. The world is a difficult, and unpredicatable, place to understand. It is a place where there are many rules and regualtions. It is a place where the rules and regulations differ everywhere you go. There is no consistent. Expected behaviour is different for each place you…… Continue reading Anxiety and Autism.