Listen. An autism plea.

It’s 2007 and I’m happy but crying Not really sure what I have become, but I’m holding the baby, I am now a Mum In the noisy room of the maternity ward, The air is sterile and clean, and the faces of crying mums and babies can be seen, And I’m feeling so old in…… Continue reading Listen. An autism plea.

All is calm.

As these calmer days go on, I find myself questioning what we are doing differently. What are we doing right? Things are settled. Things are normal for us. Not everyones normal, but no violence, no screaming, no uncontrollable rage, no meltdowns. Things are good. Homelife is good. Our house has been full of illness for…… Continue reading All is calm.

Strength.

Strength. Something you need in abundance being a carer for a child with Autism. Not just physical strength but emotional strength. Strength to change. To change yourself. To stop accepting what is. To stop doing things you do, because your child cannot cope with change. Strength to change things. To adapt your life, to move…… Continue reading Strength.

The storm. Meltdown.

When I am angry, I like to shout, It’s just the way my feelings come out. I say some things that are quite mean, I am brewing a storm; lets set the scene… My mood is foul, the skies turn black, The clouds are forming, there’s no way back, I bang and crash, my thunder’s…… Continue reading The storm. Meltdown.

Happy New Year?

I was going to try and write something inspirational. I was going to start by saying I will try and be more positive in my blog. I was going to try and find all the good in Autism and write about that instead. My new years blog resolution was to paper over the cracks and…… Continue reading Happy New Year?

Remember, remember, Autisms hard in December

Our Autism decorated our house for Christmas today. A tree and a few decorations have landed in our front room…..intruded. Lights are hung in the window where my girl can’t see them. Our house. My girls safe place. Since having a child with Autism I have really appreciated the basics of Christmas. I have learnt…… Continue reading Remember, remember, Autisms hard in December

Remember, remember the 5th of November.

The crowds are gathering, the grounds are full, There are people everywhere, So much noise from everyone chatting, The smell of hot dogs fills the air. The sky’s all dark, the crowds go still, The loud silence hurts my ears, No one has said what is happening next, I can’t speak, I’m frozen in fear.…… Continue reading Remember, remember the 5th of November.