Autism. It is all my fault.

Autism… …..it is all my fault. My baby wasn’t planned. I thought I couldn’t get pregnant. I was Anorexic and Bulimic. I wouldn’t eat for days and then I would binge and vomit. …..it is all my fault. I didn’t eat properly when I was pregnant. I worked 12.5 hour shifts where I was on…… Continue reading Autism. It is all my fault.

The concept of New Year.

Happy New Year! Today is 2017. Tomorrow is 2018. A simple concept for you and I, Not a simple concept for My Girl. Imagine not having a good sense of time. Imagine not being to tell how long 5 minutes is. How long a day is. A week. A month…….a year. Then imagine me telling…… Continue reading The concept of New Year.

So proud.

So proud. So exhausted… ….but more proud! 3 nights of next to no sleep. Huge meltdowns. Stimming. Repeating the same thing over and over. Anxiety, huge anxiety. But…. …..she did it!! Tonight was the school xmas fayre. Being in the last year of primary meant the children were given more responsibility. They were given their…… Continue reading So proud.

Ill.

As my girl drifts off to sleep I am grateful to be sitting down. I am ill. I have an infection and I just want to sleep…. ….but I can’t. I have a child with Autism. I can’t be ill. I am not allowed. My child just does not understand. It is not in her…… Continue reading Ill.

Just grumpy?

It might be just me getting older, but I feel like I cannot tolerate people anymore. It might be just because I have a child with a disability that not many people understand. It might be just because I have a child with a disability that people are aware of but don’t make the effort…… Continue reading Just grumpy?

Does our puppy hold the key?

Our puppy has opened up a part of my girl I have never seen. Does she have the key to Autisms secrets? Weighing only a tiny 1.3kg, and at the length of my hand, she has made a massive impact on our lives already. She has filled a hole we didn’t know we had. She…… Continue reading Does our puppy hold the key?

Start of the new school year.

What a start to the school year. I knew it would be hard. I temporarily forgot just how hard. I forgot how heartbreaking school mornings are. My girl did not sleep last night. At all. She has never been a good sleeper but on the nights anxiety reach their peak she can quite happily sit…… Continue reading Start of the new school year.