Time. I have lost all track of time. I waste so much of it. Everyday is spent waiting for it to be time to do something. I don’t have time to to spare, but lose so much of it. Waste it; on things that don’t even need my time. I should have time to do…… Continue reading Time.
Oh my girl, how I hate to see you unwell. How I hate to see you in pain and discomfort and not know how to soothe you. Oh my girl, how I love the cuddles when you are unwell. How I love that you feel reassured by resting your body against mine. Oh how I…… Continue reading Unwell hugs.
Sometimes I wish that people could see, A day through my eyes; what it’s like to be me. To spend all of my time doing things I am told, Will help my girl now as she grows to be old. To attend all the appointments that come in the post, To organise my day before…… Continue reading How it is.
I am a parent with anxiety. On top of all the things have to worry about as a Mum, and as a parent of a child with special needs, I worry about things that don’t matter. Not just worry, it is more than that. I get fixated on something that I cannot change and make…… Continue reading That monster.
You’d think I would feel happy and relaxed. My girl is enjoying school and going in with no problem. She is coming home happier and meltdowns are less intense. I should feel energised, refreshed….. ….but I just feel…..urgh. 11 years of stress, sleepless nights and being on alert 24/7 has left me drained. 8 years…… Continue reading Urgh….
She did it! I remember my first day of secondary school. I remember being so scared and nervous. I remember lying awake with questions whizzing around my head and not knowing the answers. I didn’t know my way around, I didn’t know the teachers names, I didn’t know who was in my tutor group. My…… Continue reading 1st day at secondary.
Sleep deprivation. A very real part of Autism. For the carers it is one of the most difficult things to handle. Everything is so much harder when you are tired. Being tired is hardwork. Being tired all the time makes everything hardwork. You never get used to it. Ever. My girl has never been a…… Continue reading So, very, tired.