A letter to my neighbours.

Dear neighbours, I sit here crying not knowing what to say as sorry never seems enough. I don’t know what I am even apologising for, I just feel the need to explain. To explain away the noise, the shouting, the endless nights we have kept you awake. My silent tears fall as the chaos around…… Continue reading A letter to my neighbours.

Normal?

How can there be a normal when your normal is so different to mine? I wondered this today when I heard a woman say, “that’s not normal is it?” to her friend as she walked by us in a shop. My girl was growling because a baby was crying and she could not bare the…… Continue reading Normal?

The guilt.

Perhaps it is wrong to admit it. Perhaps I shouldn’t even say it. The guilt eats me up inside every time I send her. …but we need it. Right? Ok. Here goes. Deep breath….. We had a lovely evening whilst my girl was at respite. There. Done. Said. Why do I feel so bad even…… Continue reading The guilt.

Some days.

Some days my girl can’t sit still. Some days she has 101 things on the go, unable to concentrate on 1 thing. Some days my girl is so anxious, and her self esteem so low, that she thinks everything she does is ‘rubbish’. Some days my girl is so restless her fustration cause meltdown… ……some…… Continue reading Some days.

Emotion help?!

Does any one elses child absolutely refuse to say, or be told they are, any of the emotion words? We are struggling so much as they come up in everyday sentances and then my girl gets fixated and angry about the word we used. Tonight it is the ‘t’ word. A daddy long legs flew…… Continue reading Emotion help?!

The eyes can’t tell.

The more time I spend trying to analyse my girls behaviour, the clearer it becomes. I begin to see her deep down below the swirls of fustration and confusion. I see her lost eyes shining through the murky fog. I hear her constant questions buzzing trying to get my attention. I feel her anger as…… Continue reading The eyes can’t tell.

Things will soon look brighter.

I can’t seem to snap out of this negative phase. Everything just feels so difficult. Everything is such an effort. I am tired. Not just tired, completely exhausted. My positivity and happiness seem to be buried so deep that I can’t quite reach it. I know it is there, I just haven’t got the energy…… Continue reading Things will soon look brighter.