Stressed. Won’t get dressed. Restless. Won’t eat breakfast. Fearful. Shouting and tearful. Scared. Won’t let me brush her hair. Panics. Hits and kicks. Confused. Tooth brushing refused. Angry. Complaining of being hungry. Bored. Instructions ignored. Withdrawn. Agrees to put clothes on. Grumpy. Uniform feels lumpy. Frustration. Says no to medication. Rude. Shouts for food. Angry.…… Continue reading School, an emotional journey.
I like to think I am a kind person. I like to think I am calm and approachable. …..I know I am not a very good friend. I am selfish and absorbed in a world of Autism and disability. They are all I talk about. They are all I think about. Everything I do and…… Continue reading Parent friendships.
Whilst out walking the puppy this evening I saw two 9 year old girls out playing. I was shocked mostly because it was dark outside, but also because they were alone. My over anxious mind then started asking me questions. Should I be allowing my girl out to play? Should I be giving her more…… Continue reading Independance.
Just when I find something that works it all goes bottoms up. We had a routine, a goal, something to work towards, and now we are unable to do it. It is the rules, it is health and safety, blah blah blah….., yes I know, you have to follow them. I understand that, I respect…… Continue reading Rules….change.
It gets too much. It eats me up. It swallows me whole and there is no way out. I live, eat, and sleep Autism. I am controlled by Autism, by its anxiety. My life is no longer my own. I am angry. I let it get to this point. I let it control everything. I…… Continue reading Anxiety.
❤ I hold her close, Up to my nose, Breath her in, Feel her warmth on my skin, Hug her tight, Kiss her goodnight. ❤ Getting a puppy was one of the best things we have ever done for my girl. Little Domino has brought out a side of her that we have never seen.…… Continue reading Our little friend.
A fear of Autism. A fear of my girl. A fear of being out of control. A fear for the future. I fear them all. I feel them all. A fear of today. A fear of tomorrow. A fear of being alone. A fear for family. I fear them all. I feel them all. I…… Continue reading Fear.